Self-Care Tips for New Parents
The early weeks of parenthood are a whirlwind of sleepless nights, feeding schedules, and adjusting to life with a new baby. With so much focus on caring for this tiny new person, it’s incredibly easy—and common—for parents to put their own needs on the back burner. As tempting as it is to "wait until things settle down," pushing self-care to the side can lead to declining mental health, strain on your partnership, and a sense of disconnection from friends and other relationships.
As a therapist and a doula I am always reminding parents that nurturing themselves isn’t selfish; it’s essential. When we take even small steps to care for our mental and emotional well-being, we’re actually more available to respond to our children and stay connected to our partner. Because it’s easy to neglect, we need to be intentional about maintaining our own sense of self. We are surviving in this early phase, but it’s also a time to find balance. By carving out moments of self-care, we build the foundation for a healthier, more fulfilling transition into this new chapter.
Keep reading for practical ways to find those small but powerful moments to recharge, both individually and as a couple. Because caring for yourself ultimately benefits your entire family—and gives you the strength to be the parent you want to be.
1. Schedule “Me Time” Like an Appointment
Personal time is often the first thing to disappear with a new baby. If we don’t write it down we justfify that we will “do it another time” or “taking care of this chore is more important”. Parents should aside a small window, even 10–15 minutes a day, just for themselves. Whether it's reading a few pages of a book, meditating, or taking a brief walk, adding it to the calendar makes it feel non-negotiable and we’re more likely to follow through. <— Not to mention our partners can help hold us accountable!
2. Reconnect with Friends
Remember those people you used to hang out with before you spent all day with your baby? Don’t forget to reach out to them! Even if it’s just for a quick check-in text or phone call. Brief connections with friends can be energizing and help you feel supported and connected. Time with friends can be a great reminder of who we are outside of being parents.
3. Engage in Pre-Parenthood Passions
How did you used ot fill your time before you had a baby? Making time for beloved hobbies, even occasionally, can be a grounding experience for new parents. If you think of it before your baby is born, write down the things you like to do. You can still do this postpartum too. Pick one or two of your interests or hobbies that you can integrate into your routine that would be fulfilling.
4. Build in Couple Time (That Isn’t Baby-Centric)
Don’t forget about your partnership! Even something as simple as "mini dates" that don’t involve talking about baby care or household responsibilities. Drink your (probably cold) coffee together in the morning, watch a favorite show, or step outside together for a brief stroll can help them connect as partners, not just co-parents. (Bonus tip: If the evenings are particularly hard- read: the witching hour- going on an evening walk, even with baby in tow can break up the end of the day and help boost everyone’s moods before you tackle bedtime).
5. Divide and Conquer – Household Responsibilities
Share household tasks to free up time for each parent to unwind. Some find that creating a loose plan for who will take on which chores during the week helps avoid the mental load and reduces stress. Check out the last blog about Sharing the Load for strategies.
6. Be Open to Asking for Help
In postpartum planning, I get the most pushback from families when we start to talk about who they are going to ask for help. There’s so much guilt I hear and worry about being a burden. I cannot emphasize this enough- Lean on your support networks! People often want to help when someone has a new baby but have no idea what would actually be meaningful. You can help direct their energy by saying what you need. Whether it's asking friends to drop off a meal, arranging a family member to help with chores or childcare so you can have a break, or seeking out a listening ear for emotional support. It might feel awkward and scary but it will pay off.
Remember, small steps add up. By nurturing yourself, you’re better able to nurture your family and can enjoy this precious, challenging, and beautiful season of life. Give yourself grace, take these moments one at a time, and know that caring for yourself is, ultimately, an act of love for your whole family.
